Oh Once Upon a Satalexton. (This “story” is insane and makes no sense. Don’t waste your time.)

In the far far away lands of Dimension-Zero, there lived a person named Satalexton.  How he came to share my internet alter-ego, is a complete coincidence. Do not ask any further questions.

^—-see that picture? It’s Satalexton of Dimension-Zero. Of course, since it’s in ZERO dimension, you cannot see it.  As a matter of fact, it is physically impossible.  Ignore that fact for the sake of simplicity.

Eight sentences have passed, and the few readers that bother to visit this site now begins to think to him/herself, “the writer must be either insane, or completely sleep-derived. Somebody needs to fix a few bolts in him.”

Well, my dear little readers, you are correct.  Now, let’s get back to the story.

One day, Satalexton realized that he does not exist! Oh noes, how is that even possible? And why does he only realize it now? These very questions filled his non-existant brain.  Feeling lost, he tried to watch Lost.

Yes, Lost.

After wasting ample amounts of time (so are you for reading this crap, and me for writing it), watching half the first season. Satalexton threw the DVD into a furnace.  Josh Holloway sucks, he thought.

Did you forget something, Satalexton?

Yes, clearly after watching hours of meaningless American soap-opera, Satalexton has already forgotten his little realization.

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Daddy has once told Satalexton, “Son, Thou shall not go to pr0n sites until thou age trans 18.”
But wait, Satalexton, thou has no Fasha! Ja, Pr0n-sites thou shall go!

 ……perhaps, Satalexton….”Barnyard Fun” Isn’t the best of sites to go to….

“MEIN EYES!!!, IT BURNS…..IT BURNS!!!!!” Satalexton screamed.  Oh he screamed and screamed. Oh dear, so much for attempting to break a rule that didn’t existed.

The pain in his eyes is unbearable.  In his fury, Satalexton H4×0r3d the site and closed it down. Cows are definitely not his cup of tea.

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Feeling down trodden by his setback, Satalexton now begins to ponder the prospects of becoming gay. Now what DOES gay mean?

Here’s a Dictionary.com definition:

gay      /geɪ/ Pronunciation Key – Show Spelled Pronunciation[gey] Pronunciation Key – Show IPA Pronunciation adjective, -er, -est, noun, adverb

–adjective

1.	having or showing a merry, lively mood: gay spirits; gay music.

2.	bright or showy: gay colors; gay ornaments.

3.	given to or abounding in social or other pleasures: a gay social season.

4.	licentious; dissipated; wanton: The baron is a gay old rogue with an eye for the ladies.

5.	homosexual.

6.	of, indicating, or supporting homosexual interests or issues: a gay organization.

–noun

7.	a homosexual person, esp. a male.

–adverb

8.	in a gay manner.

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[Origin: 1275–1325; 1950–55 for def. 5; ME gai < OF < Gmc; cf. OHG gāhi fast, sudden]

—Related forms

gayness, noun

As such, Satalexton is now confused, he’s down-trodden by the setback…and now he’s supposed to be HAPPY!? It makes no sense at all…..Perhaps he should go ask Asakura Junichi…….

<to be continued>